S.G. Browne

I Saw Zombies Eating Santa Claus Giveaway

Cover new‘Tis the season to be zombie…

In honor of the holiday season that has us firmly in its grasp and refuses to let go, I’m offering up a giveaway of I Saw Zombies Eating Santa Claus, my heartwarming Christmas tale about a little girl and her zombie.

For your chance to enter to win a signed copy, just pop on over to my Twitter Page and retweet any of my tweets for the giveaway, all of which will have the hashtag #ISawZombiesEatingSantaClaus.

You’re free to retweet as often as you like, as multiple entries are allowed, up to three (3) per person.

Not on Twitter? You can also share the contest on Facebook, Google+, or any of the other social networks included on the buttons below. Just be sure to comment on this post and let me know where you shared so you can be entered in the contest. And if you share on Facebook, it always helps to include a link to my Facebook Author Page.

Contest ends Thursday, December 4, at 11:59pm PST. Open to U.S. residents only. Good luck!

“It’s Miracle on 34th Street meets Night of the Living Dead.”
The Washington Post

“A touching and heartfelt conclusion that reluctantly moved us to tears.”
SF Weekly

“Hilarious, horrifying…a must for anyone who can’t get enough of the undead.”
San Jose Mercury News

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Filed under: Contests,Holiday,I Saw Zombies Eating Santa Claus,Zombies — S.G. Browne @ 7:54 am

I Saw Zombies Eating Santa Claus Holiday Giveaway

*UPDATE*
And the winners of the I Saw Zombies Eating Santa Claus giveaway are…drum roll please… Maria Garcia, John Hornor Jacobs, and Kelly Garbato. Congratulations! And thanks to everyone who left a comment and retweeted on Twitter. May you all have a zombie little Christmas!

Chestnuts roasting on an open fire
Jack Frost nipping at your nose
Yuletide carols being sung by a choir
And zombies dressed up like Santa Claus

With Halloween safely in the rear view mirror, we can now, freely and without fear of reprisal, plunge headlong into the holiday season. Christmas has always been one of my favorite times of year and living in San Francisco makes it that much more festive, as the town is all decked out with lights and garland and ornaments and homeless people in Santa hats.

But for me, the holidays bring back fond memories: The smell of freshly baked snickerdoodles; Heat Miser and Cold Miser doing their song and dance; the Charlie Brown Christmas soundtrack; Judy Garland singing “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas.” And when it comes to holiday movies, I’m a sucker for It’s A Wonderful Life.

Cover newSo to celebrate the dawning of the holiday season, I’m holding a giveaway for three (3) copies of my 2012 novella I Saw Zombies Eating Santa Claus: A Breathers Christmas Carol.

Entering to win is as easy as hanging your stocking: Just respond to this blog post and share what gets you in the holiday spirit, be it a favorite holiday film, TV special, Christmas carol, or the smell of pumpkin pie. Whatever floats your holiday boat. I’ll do a random drawing of all entrants to determine the winners.

TWITTER BONUS: If you’re on Twitter and you re-tweet my post about the contest, that will get you an additional entry into the contest. If you don’t follow me on Twitter, my handle is @s_g_browne.

Contest runs until Friday, November 8 at 11:59pm PST and is open to U.S. residents only. Good luck!

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Andy’s Favorite Things: An Ode to Breathers

In honor of the upcoming holidays, and the recent publication of my heartwarming Christmas zombie story I Saw Zombies Eating Santa Claus, I thought I’d resurrect Andy’s holiday wish list from Breathers.

But rather than simply providing a list, I wanted to share Andy’s desires in song to the Rodgers and Hammerstein tune, “My Favorite Things” from The Sound of Music.

And a one and a two…

Blood drops on noses and flesh that’s been bitten,
Pale female corpses who with me are smitten,
Fraternity pledges all tied up with strings,
These are a few of my favorite things.

Cream colored femurs and crisp Breather strudels,
Eyeballs and earlobes and tonsils with noodles,
Undead Anonymous pot luck meetings,
These are a few of my favorite things.

Dead guys in coffins with red gaping gashes,
Corpses that wake up from fatal car crashes,
Embalming treatments and Pine-Sol soakings,
These are a few of my favorite things.

When the flesh rots,
When the skin slips,
When I lose a limb,
I simply remember my favorite things,
And then I don’t feel so grim.

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Zombie Christmas Haiku Contest Winners

Thanks to everyone who participated in the I Saw Zombies Eating Santa Claus Holiday Haiku Giveaway. The haiku ranged from dark to funny to oddly arousing and made it difficult for me, I mean for Andy, to pick a winner.

It took him a while to narrow the entries from twenty down to six, then four, then three. At that point, Andy couldn’t narrow it down any more, so instead of two winners receiving a signed copy of I Saw Zombies Eating Santa Claus, he decided there should be three winners.

Congratulations to Kim Miner, Buck Swindle, and Russell Rheingrover for their winning zombie holiday haiku!

Under mistletoe
He leans in, I blow his mind
with a shotgun blast

—Kim Miner

Stocking hung with care
Christmas sweater, photo time
Check my teeth for flesh

—Buck Swindle

Santa meets undead
Look out don’t get bit OH NO!
Now he’s Zombie Claus

—Russell Rheingrover

Thank you to everyone who took the time to compose a haiku and share your zombie holiday poetry. It’s only fun if others play along, so I appreciate your participation and support. You. Are. Awesome.

Have yourself a zombie little Christmas.

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Filed under: Contests,Haikus,Holiday,I Saw Zombies Eating Santa Claus,Zombies — S.G. Browne @ 8:35 am

My Top Ten (Plus One) Holiday Songs

I was going to blog about my Top Ten Holiday Films, but I decided that was about as original as picking the New York Yankees to get to the World Series. Besides, it’s not like there would be a whole lot of surprises:

It’s A Wonderful Life, A Christmas Story, Elf, The Santa Clause, Bad Santa, Miracle on 34th Street, Die Hard, and The Family Man. Though I’m not sure how many lists would have included Edward Scissorhands (yes, the climax takes place at Christmas) or Planes, Trains and Automobiles (true, it’s Thanksgiving, but last I checked that was still a holiday.)

So now that we’ve got that out of the way, here are my Top Ten Holiday Songs and the artists who sing my favorite versions:

“Winter Wonderland” (Louis Armstrong)
I love me some Louis Armstrong and no other version of “Winter Wonderland” hits the same notes with me as this one. This song is playing at the beginning of Chapter 50 in Breathers. Sing it, Satchmo.

“Happy Xmas” (John Lennon)
Yes, it’s a bit of a political song, but The Beatles are my favorite all time band and Lennon my favorite songwriter of the group, so this one makes the list. Plus I love the Harlem Community Choir signing in the background.

“A Holly Jolly Christmas” (Burl Ives)
This is the classic version from Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer that always makes me feel like a kid again. I can almost hear the reindeer up on the roof.

“Christmas Time Is Here” (Vince Guaraldi)
This vocal choir version from A Charlie Brown Christmas is such a sweet holiday song and the instrumentals are absolutely beautiful. See “A Holly Jolly Christmas” for the way this song makes me feel.

“The Christmas Song” (Nat King Cole)
The perfect song to appreciate your friends or family or that special someone around the fire or the Christmas tree. Thanks Nat.

“Baby, It’s Cold Outside” (Petula Clark & Rod McKuen)
The most playful and risque version of this song I’ve heard. And you’ve got to love a holiday song about a guy who’s working hard to get some cold weather action.

“Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas” (Judy Garland)
This is the It’s A Wonderful Life of Christmas songs. Sweet and poignant and filled with hope. No one owns “Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas” like Judy Garland.

“It’s The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year” (Andy Williams)
No other song gets me revved up for Christmas like this version by Andy Williams. For some reason, it always manages to give me goosebumps.

“Father Christmas” (The Kinks)
I’ve always been a fan of the Kinks and came across this gem of a social commentary holiday song about poor kids threatening Santa. “Father Christmas, give us some money, don’t mess around with those silly toys…”

“Santa Claus Is Back In Town” / “Merry Christmas Baby” (Elvis Presley)
No list of Christmas songs would be complete without something from The King. I couldn’t pick just one and went with these two because I love the R&B influence in both of them.

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Filed under: Holiday,Just Blogging,Movies and Books,Music — S.G. Browne @ 7:56 pm