S.G. Browne

On Friday July 10th, starting at 5:45PM, zombies of the world will rise up and demand their civil rights on the steps of San Francisco City Hall.

Zombies have been treated like third class citizens for too long, so come support equal rights for zombies. All zombies and zombie supporters welcome.

At 7pm we will hobble a few blocks over to Books, Inc. at Opera Plaza to hear un-undead Scott G. Browne read from his new book, Breathers: A Zombie’s Lament. After that it’s any zombie’s guess.

Come for the protest.

Stay for the reading and signing of Breathers.

Free “Zombies Are People Too” swag while supplies last.

Bring Signs to show your support. Use your imagination, but here are some ideas.

– Zombies are people Too
– We Are Recruiting
– Brains. The Other White Meat
– ZombieMatch.com
– We’re Hear. We’re Dead. Get Used To It.
– Benefits for Zombie Vets
– Stop Trying to Bury Us

See all you zombies there!

The digestive organs and the lungs disintegrate first, for they are home to the greatest number of bacteria…The brain is another early-departure organ.  “Because all the bacteria in the mouth chew through the palate,” explains Arpad.  And because brains are soft and easy to eat.  “The brain liquefies very quickly.  It just pours out the ears and bubbles out the mouth.”

The previous kernel of post-mortem knowledge comes from Chapter 3 of Mary Roach’s STIFF: The Curious Lives of Human Cadavers, a wonderful little book about what happens to the human body after it stops walking around and starts to smell.
STIFF was instrumental in my research into what Andy and the other zombies in Breathers might have to contend with as they confronted the reality of their decomposing existence – sloughage, bloat, maggots feasting on their subcutaneous fat.  All of the everyday things zombies worry about.  In addition, STIFF also provided some insight into the consequences they might face should they get a little too uppity:

Over the past sixty years, the dead have helped the living work out human tolerance limits for skull slammings and chest skewerings, knee crammings and gut mashings; all the ugly, violent things that happen to a human being in a car crash.

From STIFF I learned that when maggots feast on subcutaneous fat it sounds like Rice Krispies, that when the internal organs liquefy they turn to chicken soup, and that up until 1965, necrophilia wasn’t a crime in any U.S. state.  Not really sure what made everyone change their mind then, but since I was born in 1965, I’m sure there’s some cosmic connection.
What made STIFF such a pleasure to read, rather than simply pouring through a bunch of facts about putrefaction and rigor mortis and forensic science, was the funny, matter-of-fact style of Mary Roach.  Her humor and light-hearted irreverence toward the dead makes reading about impact testing and anal leakage a lot of fun.  No, really.

If you like a good non-fiction read with a touch of morbid fascination, then I recommend you pick up a copy of STIFF.  As Entertainment Weekly says, it’s “Gross, educational, and unexpectedly sidesplitting.”

(Next entry:  T is for Tom)

Calling all zombies!  Calling all zombies!

Put on your best funeral clothes, apply that liquid latex, stock up on stage blood, and shuffle, shamble, and stagger your way to the Pacific Northwest for a pre-Independence Day party of the undead.
On Friday, July 3, 2009, Fremont Outdoor Movies in Seattle is hosting the Red, White, & Dead Zombie Party – a zombie bash to end all zombie bashes that includes a screening of Shaun of the Dead, a Zombie Fashion Show where you can strut your decomposing self to the delight of your fellow zombies, a group “Thriller” dance for those zombies stuck in the 80s, and a Zombie Walk to break the Guinness World Record.

And to kick everything off, I’ll be reading from and signing copies of Breathers at 4:00PM at Fremont Place Books and then later at the event.  I’ll even have some free zombie schwag I’ll be giving away, though supplies are limited.

You can find all the details and times and other good zombie info by checking out the official blog for Fremont Outdoor Movies.

Spread the word and the contagion!

And remember, zombies are people, too.

“Rita’s face is a pale moon hovering in the black hood of her sweatshirt. She has on a black turtleneck and black pants. The only color she’s wearing is on her lips, which are Eternal Red.”

This is the first glimpse of Rita, a suicide who slit her wrists on her twenty-third birthday and who consumes formaldehyde in trace amounts by eating lipstick, fingernail polish, and other cosmetic products.  She’s the only character, other than Andy, who made the jump from my short story “A Zombie’s Lament” to Breathers.

Rita is also the love interest for Andy, who becomes increasingly attracted to Rita in spite of his feelings of guilt and loss regarding the death of his wife.  As Andy puts it when dealing with his conflicting feelings about his wife and Rita and describing the differences between the two:

“One who is dead and cold, the other who is undead and hot.”

When I started out writing Breathers, although I had the character of Rita in my head, I didn’t intend for Andy to develop feelings for her and for the two of them to fall in love.  Their relationship just seemed to develop as the story went on and it only made sense for the two of them to start up an undead romance.  I think the first moment when this happened is in Chapter 10, when Andy goes for a walk on a Sunday morning and ends up meeting Rita just at the moment when he’s feeling like he’s made a big mistake.  Which is actually one of my favorite chapters in the book.  I remember finishing the chapter and thinking, “Well, that was fun.”

Obviously Andy is my favorite character in Breathers, and while Jerry holds a very dear spot in my heart as my second favorite, Rita was an absolute pleasure to discover.

(Next entry:  S is for STIFF)

I originally planned on having this post be Q is for Quitting, which would address the voice in the head of the writer that often speaks up and says:  “Why are you doing this to yourself?”  But I wasn’t really happy with the way the post was developing.  Plus it had such negative connotations that I ended up going in another direction.  So instead, I decided to address some of the general questions I’ve received about influences, favorite films, books, music, that sort of thing. I know, not particularly deep but I’m feeling lazy today.

To keep it simple without elaborating too much while at the same time paying homage to High Fidelity (Nick Hornby) and the male instinct for making lists, here are some of my Top 5 Lists.  I stayed away from my Most Memorable Split-Ups and Top Five Dream jobs and instead focused on artists, musicians, and films that inspire or influence my own writing.

Favorite Authors
1) Chuck Palahniuk
2) Christopher Moore
3) Stephen King
4) Kurt Vonnegut
5) Gregory Maguire

Favorite Books
1) The Stand by Stephen King
2) Lullaby by Chuck Palahniuk
3) Lord of the Flies by William Golding
4) Lamb:The Gospel According to Biff, Christ’s Childhood Pal by Christopher Moore
5) Cat’s Cradle by Kurt Vonnegut

Favorite Bands
1) The Beatles
2) Green Day
3) The Doors
4) Sublime
5) Cake (before they got rid of their horns)
(Honorable mention goes to the Pixies, Weezer, and the Violent Femmes)

Favorite Music to Listen to for Inspiration
1) Green Day
2) Pixies
3) Sublime
4) Morphine
5) AC/DC (before Bon Scott choked on his own vomit)

Favorite Films
1) Fight Club
2) Being John Malkovich
3) The Big Lebowski
4) Unbreakable
5) Donnie Darko

Favorite Soundtrack Moments in Films
1) “Tiny Dancer” (Elton John) – Almost Famous
2) “Build Me Up Buttercup” (The Foundations) – There’s Something About Mary
3) “Down With the Sickness” (Richard Cheese) – Dawn of the Dead (2004)
4) “Where Is My Mind?” (Pixies) – Fight Club
5) “Bullwinkle Part II” (The Centurions) – Pulp Fiction
(If I had a theme song to play whenever I walked into a room, this would be it)

(Next entry: R is for Rita)